6 Ways To Boost Your Self-Esteem When You’re Feeling Down

When you aren’t feeling the best about yourself it can impact a lot of areas in your life. Your mood, your energy, how productive you feel, and depending on how severe it is, your overall health and general wellbeing.

Having low self-esteem is unfortunately quite common and many people might be prone to feel that way because they’re hard on themselves and preconditioned to a negative way of thinking. Instead of acknowledging what’s great about themselves, they tend to direct their attention and praise outwards to other people.

Break out unhealthy habits and ways of thinking that deplete your confidence. Consider these 6 handy strategies for raising your self-esteem when you need it most.

1. Do Something You’re Good At

It’s only natural that you feel confident when you’re doing something you personally consider yourself good at. If being “good” at something is intimidating, then at least try to do something you don’t overthink. This activity doesn’t have to be to-do list-related, it can be something as simple as reading a book or making a playlist of songs to listen to later.

Another way to think about it is doing something you feel comfortable with and typically do everyday without much thought. If your day doesn’t feel right without you walking your dog or writing in your journal, go ahead and take the time to do those things when you can. If you’re feeling down about yourself, it’s fine to break your routine and occupy yourself with things that you’re capable of doing and accustomed to.

2. Ask Other People To Describe You

We’re more inclined to worry about what other people think and see our value through their acknowledgment or recognition. That’s part of the unhealthy cycle that needs to be broken in order to feel more self-confident over time, but you can also use this tendency for a quick boost that will ideally shift to a healthy habit.

Instead of waiting for other people to give you confidence and their opinion of your worth, go ahead and ask them yourself; just be sure to be mindful of who you ask. The best candidates are the people who you interact with frequently and likely have a good impression of who you are as a friend.

It doesn’t have to be someone you’ve known for years or is sure to shower you with praise, what matters is that you ask more than one person and are close enough to them that asking the question, “how would you describe me?” doesn’t feel too awkward. Maybe it’s a neighbor you’ve invited over for a barbeque, a family member, a coworker, or a classmate you’ve worked with for a while.

When they respond, pay attention to the positive descriptions they have of you or anything surprising that doesn’t fit your own image or impression of yourself. They may bring up certain moments that you stood out to them as kind or hardworking and those are important to remember and think back to when you slip into self-deprecating thoughts or feel unsure of yourself.

Related: 5 of The Best Places to Meet Fellow Introverts

3. Reflect On Your Favorite Memories

When you’re feeling unconfident, you’re stuck in the present and in that moment of negativity. A way to mentally take yourself out of that is to recall a happy memory and focus on it as long as you need to. It can be more than one memory and it doesn’t necessarily have to be happy, it should just be one that distracts you enough from your current state of feeling insecure.

By remembering a different time we remind ourselves not only of that event or moment but a different version of ourselves in that separate time. The feelings that were felt during the memory should come back and hopefully jolt you into a more forgiving and open-minded space where you see yourself differently. It might just be a small step, but any amount of positive change matters when you’re in a low place.

4. Pay Attention To Your Environment

Several studies have strongly suggested that a person’s environment plays an important role in their emotional and mental state. When we’re in a well-lit room, we tend to think more positively and feel at ease. When your surroundings are crowded and difficult to navigate like a cluttered room, you naturally feel more burdened and have a harder time dealing with your emotions.

That’s why you should always factor in the environment you’re in and how it might be influencing your confidence level. If you’d feel hesitant to let someone like a friend or even a stranger into your home in its current state, that could mean it isn’t an environment that’s positive.

If you can’t help but be in a space that makes you feel down, then change your environment by going elsewhere. The amount of time you spend alone or in the same space is important to think about, if you’ve been indoors for a long time, try going outdoors and embracing the completely different offerings – from the difference in air quality, objects, and sounds.


5. Let Yourself Feel Deeply

Letting go and allowing yourself to feel down may seem like making matters worse, but sometimes it’s just what you need in order to get yourself to a place where you’re willing to be kinder to yourself. If you fight against recurring feelings that put you down and lower your self-esteem, you miss an opportunity to resolve them.

Allow yourself to feel what you need to because not doing so may make it worse later on. Feelings build up and become stronger and more damaging if you don’t acknowledge them. Take the time that you need to face those thoughts and feelings and accept yourself.

You’re a person capable of feeling a certain way about yourself, which means you’re just as capable to think differently. Don’t run away from who you are and your tendencies – welcome them and realize that you’re in control of how you feel.

6. Change Your Appearance

Self-confidence needs to be built up from your own perception of yourself. Think about how you imagine yourself and consider ways you might want to change to feel happier. Considering physical changes to your appearance can help you think about positive self-change in a tangible way.

Maybe you’ve always had the same hairstyle or wear clothes that unconsciously made you feel unconfident. Consider what you admire about others in terms of their appearance. Is there a certain style that appeals to you? Have you had a passing thought that you might look good wearing something or changing something about your appearance? Act on that thought and experiment with yourself. Don’t overthink the change because 99% of things you change can be changed again or reverted.







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Antoinette Maven

"Antony" Maven is a contributing writer for SimpleHermit.com and identifies as an INFP. She loves to hike with her dog, write poetry, find hidden gems in her small town, and read her nights away.